Anxiety, a Love Letter

Most days at some point - especially in the morning - my anxiety screams at me that THERE’S SOMETHING WRONG!

It yells to me to DO SOMETHING! 

It terrorizes me in the chest, grabs my shoulders, and squeezes my mind.

It looks me wildly in the eyes, and it tells me to f-ing find them! Find the problems with me, find the problems with my life, and SOLVE THEM NOW! 

It yells for me to avoid my commitments, to stay frozen in place, and to expend any energy I have in searching my mind and thoughts for the way out, for the way to freedom.

In an internal battle, anxiety is unrelenting. There's no way out, there's no backing down, and the game feels over before I've even had a chance to get my bearings. 

And...

I’ve fallen in love with anxiety. 

Anxiety is one of my greatest teachers. 

It's taught me awareness of my feelings and awareness of my unintentional mind. 

It continues to teach me courage, and it guides me to confidence.

It teaches me with choice: BE a victim to my feelings and thinking, or own my spirit’s ability to soar in ALL weather.

And wow, do I love to soar.

When I hear or feel the beginning whispers of anxiety, I no longer resist it or run from it. Anxiety is a love letter from an unseen teacher, a higher part of myself and the universe/God. I know that now.

But insights are a dime a dozen, and though transformation begins with insight, it gets realized in practice.

My morning routine is sacred to me. It’s an opportunity to meet my anxiety. An opportunity to commune with my heart, my mind, and my real desires. It has given me the space and the practice to fall in love with ALL of it. 

It’s not magic, but it’s so very magical.

Heaven is among us.

Which resistant, judgmental, and fearful part of yourself are you ready to let loose in order to be born again in love, passion, ease, enjoyment, and peace?

I’m here to help. Reach out if you’d like to honor the truest and deepest part of yourself over the unintentional and ineffective habits of mind, heart, and body that you continue to struggle with.

Thank you for reading my work. ❤️

P.S. As a transformational coach, I help teens, adults, and organizations move beyond their self-imposed limitations to be their best and feel their best. If you’re interested in finding out how I can support you or your organization, reach out and let’s talk. 💌

Your Most Valuable Asset

This is my 200th post to this blog! 2 years and 10 months since my first post. At least 30 minutes of writing, per day, for the first year, and well over 300 hours of writing in total.

This blog started as an idea to explore awakening the true self in education.

We all have ideas - many of them! Why did this one stick?

Because I committed to it. I made a promise to play the game to the best of my ability and transform anything that got in the way.

18-and-a-half years ago, the day I asked Amy to marry me, I made a similar promise to her. I committed to letting go of anything that got in the way of me being an amazing husband to her for the rest of our lives.

Last week I committed to leveling up my physical health, and I put money on the line. I told my friend, Pete, that I’d exercise at least three times a week or else I’d give him $20.

I’m probably in the best shape of my adult life, yet there’s a level of physical health I’ve never achieved. Mostly, I’ve given up on the idea that it’s even possible for me to level up. I eat great, I work out a couple times a week, and my schedule is already pretty busy! What more could I do?

But last week I realized something - and it’s rather obvious in retrospect…Physical health and well-being happen in the mind first.

Being in great shape hasn't really been about my body at all. It's been about my mind.

In fact, everything happens in the mind first.

Our relationships - spouse, kids, friends, pets, colleagues, neighbors - all happen in the mind first.

Our health and well-being - energy, peace, strength, focus, exercise - all happen in the mind first.

Our effectiveness at work - satisfaction, enjoyment, compensation - all happen in the mind first.

Enthusiasm, passion, creativity, enjoyment? In the mind first.

Love, compassion, understanding, connection? In the mind first.

Our biggest hurdles are also in the mind: Doubt. Fear. Reasons. Indecision. Lack of willpower.

Yes, it all happens in the mind first.

My mind is my most valuable asset. It’s the one part of me that makes ALL else possible.

And the mind isn’t simply the brain. The mind is so much more. It’s story. It’s creation. It’s a universe of possibility once we learn to tap into it and move beyond the lies, pretenses, and illusions that hold us back and keep us and others small.

Now, all of that is a nice insight.

Insights are a dime a dozen. When I scroll through my social media feed, I find insightful videos and posts, inspirational quotes, and other powerful truths that resonate right to my core.

So what is it that turns insight into actual transformation?

First, listen. If it's something that actually inspires you and invites you to see something new being possible in life, sit with the idea and the feeling of inspiration.

Second, commit. If it's something you actually want, it serves your core values, and it doesn't conflict with your other core values and commitments, commit to it!

Third, honor your commitment. Look, this isn't always easy. This is actually where the work comes in. And it's only the mind that can both get in our way and also get us back to clarity, peace, and motivation.

And trust me - support is a must. I get to live a life I love due to my years of training and practicing, and also because I have a one-on-one coach, a #ProFriend, and a community of committed partners.

Commitment, done well, is the higher mind making a choice that our future self only needs to align with. That's what it means to create your world.

It all begins with the mind - our most valuable asset.

Thanks so much for reading. ❤️

P.S. As a transformational coach, I help teens, adults, and organizations move beyond their self-imposed limitations to be their best and feel their best. If you’re interested in finding out how I can support you or your organization, reach out and let’s talk. 💌

What's Your Agenda?

Each of us - at all times - has an agenda.

The key question is this: are you honoring a default agenda or a created agenda?

Default agendas:

• Look good, or at least avoid looking bad

• Control, or avoid being controlled

• Dominate, or avoid being dominated

• Win, or avoid losing

• Be right, or avoid being wrong

• Be liked, or avoid being disliked

We have agendas in our relationships with our family, with our friends, with our colleagues, and even with ourselves.

And it's usually the default agenda.

Schools are the incubators for the next generation of adults, so I was initially surprised to see how many adults in a school building are living out the default agendas of adolescence.

The control struggles. The domination struggles. The struggle to look good and avoid looking bad.

I fall into the trap of default agendas too! Fortunately, however, I've also had powerful training and coaching in how to create and live inside the full power and possibility of adulthood.

Which means -

When I teach computer science...

When I teach engineering...

When I teach physics...

My main agenda is the student.

Compassion. Engagement. Presence. Honor. Truth. Possibility.

The subject of discussion is usually the class topic, but the most important subjects in the room are the students and me.

How we see. How we be. How we grow.

How we step beyond the probable and into the possible.

I am also a life coach.

My coaching and mind mastery group experiences are even more direct and to the heart of the matter: we focus on the person I am with and the person I AM.

Not the personalities.

Not the stories.

Not the limitations.

The person within. 🫵

Yes we deal with the personalities. Yes we deal with the limitations. Yes we deal with the stories.

But only in service of the real agenda:

The True You. The Authentic You. The Holy and Divine You.

The You capable of living a life you love, no exceptions.

Fulfilled. Empowered. Clear. Peaceful. Effective. Loving.

A whole new world is possible - for each of us individually, and all of us collectively.

Get straight about your underlying, default agendas, and then create an agenda worth living for.

It's the most important work you can do.

Thanks so much for reading. ❤️

P.S. As a transformational life coach, I help teens, adults, and organizations move beyond their self-imposed limitations to be their best and feel their best. If you’re interested in finding out how I can support you or your organization, reach out and let’s talk. 💌