Sailing vs. "Not Drowning"

Here’s how life is like the ocean: there are calm days, there are stormy days, and there's everything in between. 

The waves can range from tiny and unnoticeable to huge and daunting. 

The winds can vary from light and breezy to strong and squall-like. 

The sunshine can warm, and the rain and hail can pelt. 

That’s life: varying conditions, some quite uncomfortable, some quite comfortable, and most in between.

Here’s how most of us live on this ocean of life: "not drowning." 

"Another Monday." 

"Here we go again."

"I’d rather be anywhere else."

"Is it Friday yet?"

"Just making it through."

"I’m doin’."

There’s nothing wrong with this way of life! It’s a way of living we learned from our culture. It’s a way of living that helped our genes survive the millennia. 

And it’s a constrained way of living.

"Not drowning" dishonors the vitality, creativity, joy, and love that’s possible for each of us.

Here’s an alternative to living a life of “not drowning”: Sailing.

Sailing is a dance between the agency of the sailors and the conditions of the ocean: the waves, wind, and current.

There’s a profound difference between living life to not drown on the one hand and living life to sail on the other.

Not drowning is a struggle. Sailing is a dance.

Not drowning is surviving. Sailing is thriving.

Not drowning is reacting to circumstances. Sailing is creating in the presence of circumstances.

Sometimes even sailors can’t do anything but batten down the hatches until the storm has passed, and that is absolutely a wise thing to do.

When the storm has settled, though, the sailors get back to sailing (dancing) by cleaning up, mending the damage, and setting sail.

The only instruments we need if we're focused on "not drowning" are measuring instruments:

• measuring the current conditions and predicting the future conditions

• worrying about these current and future conditions

• fearing these current and future conditions

Those instruments are great and necesssary, but they're secondary to the sailor's primary instrument: the compass.

Direction.

Purpose.

Intention.

If we don't create intentions, if we aren't connected to a purpose worthy of our life, then we're left with a life of not drowning. There are some really pleasant moments in this life. But it's not sailing.

We are built to sail. Come master it with me.

Thank you for reading. ❤️

P.S. As a transformational coach, I help teens, adults, and organizations move beyond their self-imposed limitations to be their best and feel their best. If you’re interested in finding out how I can support you or your organization, reach out and let’s talk. 💌

Rebel.

"i rebel by loving more" - Yung Pueblo

There are parts of myself that I don't like sometimes. And my kids' preferences bug me. And my initial reaction to the weather is to complain.

Yet I'm a rebel.

i rebel by loving more

My spouse. My kids. My dog. My house.

My height. My weight. My shape. My sensations.

My emotions. My thoughts. My mood. My stress.

My past. My present. My future. My "could be"s.

My job. My colleagues. My boss. My responsibilities.

My location. My weather. My commute. My scene.

One of my kids likes watching gamers on youtube. By default, I'm not interested at all.

Yet I'm a rebel.

i rebel by caring more

About myself. My health. My well-being. My peace of mind.

About others. Their well-being. Their satisfaction. Their enjoyment.

About the world. Its well-being. Its inhabitants. Its creatures.

My older son asks me to buy him things, take him places, and do things for him. My default reaction is almost always "No."

Yet I'm a rebel.

i rebel by giving more

Of my willingness. Of my time. Of my patience. Of my stuff.

James Dean. Rosa Parks. Margaret Sanger. The Buddha. Jesus. Paul Robeson. Susan B. Anthony. The Fonz. Morpheus.

There’s something inspiring about a rebel. They call to something within us. They breathe an air into us and cause our inner flame to flare.

Here’s what inspires us about rebels: they live for something beyond the default. The live for something beyond their fears, beyond what society and culture says is normal, beyond what we tend to think is possible.

They live for something beyond the illusions of "normal."

You want more love? Be more loving. 

You want more vitality? Be more interested.

You want more connection? Be more generous.

You want more peace? Be more trusting.

You want more fulfillment? Be more happy.

Rebel against what you think about yourself and others.

Rebel against what you think is fair. Rebel against what you think is impossible.

Rebel against your default.

This is the final revolution. The revolution our families need. The revolution our workplaces need. The revolution the world needs.

The revolution our souls need.

Rebel by creating your life, not just living some default life made up of default preferences.

Thank you for reading. ❤️

P.S. As a transformational coach, I help teens, adults, and organizations move beyond their self-imposed limitations to be their best and feel their best. If you’re interested in finding out how I can support you or your organization, reach out and let’s talk. 💌

Powerfully Practical, and Entirely Spiritual

A couple months ago, a client of mine produced an extraordinary result in his life. Something that he’d been grappling with for a long time suddenly became clear and easy for him.

In our conversation last week, he reflected how that one moment of transformation a couple months ago has lasted. He’s made a change and he’s never looked back.

This transformation was powerfully practical, and it was entirely spiritual.

Most of the time, we think of our goals solely as something practical, something in the physical world we either achieve or we don’t. And because of this, we focus solely on the strategies, the technique, the doing.

Here are some examples:

Goal: Experience greater health and well-being. We tend to think that this is just a matter of actions we take or of physical quantities like energy-level, motivation-level, or genetics. 

Goal: Experience greater effectiveness at work. We think we simply need better strategies in order to perform better - strategies with our assignments and strategies for our relationships. 

Goal: Experience love and fulfillment in marriage. We think this depends on finding the right person, having the same preferences, or if we could just behave better towards each other.

Strategies are valuable, and they're not sufficient.

To achieve the worthwhile practical results in ways that feed our overall well-being, it generally requires inner work too. The spiritual work.

In other words, achieving our Goal-Line results requires Soul-Line work.

This is the work my client has been doing, and it's impacting every area of his life. It's what led directly to the extraordinary breakthrough I referenced above.

(In fact, it's the work that all my clients are doing, whether they recognize it or not!)

It's the inner work. The spiritual work. The soul-line work.

Aligning ALL levels of who we are. Integrity from our deep core to our bodies, words, and actions.

When we've done the work to align ourselves at all levels of our being, the results show up seemingly out of nowhere. Like magic. Like divine intervention.

And the truth is, it is divine intervention. By doing the inner work, the divine is better able to do its work.

Powerfully practical, and entirely spiritual.

Thank you for engaging with my work. ❤️

P.S. As a transformational coach, I help teens, adults, and organizations move beyond their self-imposed limitations to be their best and feel their best. If you’re interested in finding out how I can support you or your organization, reach out and let’s talk. 💌