mwesigwa-joel-jHvedTh-avo-unsplash_edite

Explorations and Reflections

on awakening the true self  in education

Search
  • Mick Scott

Our problems aren’t always what they seem. Perhaps, in fact, they're never what they seem...


A client shared how dishes can be a problem in her marriage. She and her husband have different ideas about the best approach to cleaning the dishes. Sometimes they get upset with each other about it. Frustration comes out. Anger comes out. One or both of them ends up feeling hurt, unseen, unloved, or disrespected.

It’s not about the dishes.


Just this morning, no joke, I got frustrated with how one of my kids handled his dirty breakfast dishes.

It’s not about the dishes.


In the classroom, kids don’t always act “right”, they don’t always focus as they “should”, they don't always care about the things they're "supposed" to care about.

It's not about students’ behavior.


Sometimes my wife’s tone gets to me.

It’s not about her tone.


Sometimes we get stressed about getting work done on time.

It’s not about the work being done on time.


When we’re ghosted, ignored, invalidated, or brushed aside.

It’s not about how we’ve been treated.


When nothing seems to be going our way or we think we’ve failed.

It’s not about the potential failure.


When I’m judging myself and feeling down.

It’s not about the self-judgments and criticisms.


When the money feels short.

It's not about the money.


So if it’s not about the dishes, what's it about???


Yes! With this question, we begin to step through the illusion of the problem.


Perhaps the problem has nothing to do with dishes or behavior or results or respect, and everything to do with an opening, an opportunity for growth, a fertile spot within us for new spiritual, emotional, physical, and mental growth.


There never really is a problem. "Problem" is just a label we slap onto a circumstance that doesn't look the way we think it's supposed to look. It's thinking that our lives and the people in them have to line up and look just right for us to feel free, loved, and safe.


So the "problem" actually points us to an opportunity - every time. It's an opportunity, an opening, a fertile plot of soil. It's a reminder to tend our gardens - our spiritual, physical, emotional, and mental gardens.


Others can help us look, explore, and poke around the territory, but only we can say for ourselves what's really underneath the "problem".


So I invite you: next time you're feeling stressed, anxious, frustrated, angry, or resigned, take a deeper look and ask yourself, "If it's not really about this situation, what's this problem about? What's the opportunity for growth here?"


Thanks so much for reading. ❤️


P.S. If you're interested in exploring how working with me can turn your "problems" into inspiring and powerful opportunities for growth, schedule a free exploration conversation with me today.


  • Mick Scott

There is a choice available to us every moment: to create a life and world that inspires us, or to accept the life and world that “happens” to us. This is the choice between being a creator and being a victim.


And yes, it's a choice available to us every moment.


To create begins with a willingness to create. It begins with a willingness to take ownership of who we are and where we are, ownership of our experience, and ownership of our ability to create.


To create invites us to see that we’re already creating. It invites us to see our thinking - the intentional and the unintentional, the conscious and the unconscious, the fearful and the proud - as a creation. Our creation.


To create requires us to be willing to put aside the bull crap that we’ve bought into about ourselves, others, and the world. To quit complaining about ourselves and others. To quit complaining about our situation. To quit complaining about life.


To create means to act from within. To absorb those helpful lessons of our culture and to toss the useless or constraining ones. Creation can be in support of existing culture and it can be in service of building a new culture. Creating is intentional and it’s aware.


Look, we’re already creating. It’s just that we’re recreating someone else’s designs - the designs of our families, our culture, our peers, our entertainment and advertisements. It’s like we’re playing someone else’s game with someone else’s rules in someone else’s sandbox with someone else’s toys.


Instead of creating ourselves to fit the mold of culture and all its conditioning, let’s consider something else. Let’s consider what inspires us.


Inspiration is true. We can trust it. It’s a unification of the external and the internal. It’s an experience of harmony. An awakening of the spirit. A compass needle. An extension of an ancient, divine yearning.


What matters to you? What do you care about? What would you love to create in your life? In your relationships? In your world? In the world?


I invite you to be a creator. Create something. Create anything. Create it from inside. Create it in your own way. Create something that represents you. Create something that inspires you. Create something that matters to you.


Create courageously.


You don’t have to. There’s nothing wrong with creating the way you’ve been told is the right way to create. There's nothing wrong with coloring between the lines of someone else's design. Nothing wrong at all.


But wow, to have this superpower at our fingertips... We are so freakin’ blessed.


NOTE: I'm not suggesting that creating is playing God. I am, however, suggesting that we use all our gifts and skills to live our best life. Oh, and a pro tip: Creation is actually happening through us, not from us. 😉


Thank you for creating time and space in your life to read this post. ❤️


P.S. If you’d like to explore what creating life with the support of a coach feels like, schedule a conversation with me today.


  • Mick Scott

One morning last week, my alarm went off and I did NOT want to get up to do my morning routine. I laid there on the bed/fence for a minute or two, not yet committed either way.


Then I had this thought: "Be a Pro. Get up."


So I got my butt out of bed and began the work of preparing my body and mind for my day. It worked, and I got there.


Abandon all hope. See, if I went back to sleep I would've hoped to have a good day. I would've hoped everything would work out. I would've hoped my mind and body would be awake enough to deal with whatever arose.


When we're being a Pro, hope doesn't factor in. We show up, do our absolute best, and accept the results.


The "Abandon all hope" gate into hell is an instruction: hope isn't how you make it through hell. You make it through hell with commitment and discipline.


The right kind of commitment and discipline, however, aren't ends in themselves - they support us in living an empowered life.


Commitment and discipline are our access to well-being. They're our access to insight. They're our access to integrity. They're our access to living an empowered, created life.


Now, there are different kinds of hope.


One kind of hope is that it’s a vision of what's possible, a lighthouse guiding us to a better future. This version of hope is creative and empowering, it’s inspiring.


Another kind of hope is a desire for something to happen to us, something we feel powerless over, like a gift from chance. This kind of hope is reactive and reinforces insecure perspectives on ourselves.


And when it comes to anything, if hope authentically empowers you and supports you, keep using it! But if it's something that keeps you small or allows you to half-ass it, then be aware of its limitations and let it go.


It’s fine being an amateur in this arena or that arena. Living our best life, though - that’s probably someplace we all would like to be a Pro.


(Thank you to Steven Pressfield for his powerful book, The War of Art, and to Martha Beck for her powerful book, The Way of Integrity, both of which inspired this post.)


Thank you so much for reading. ❤️


P.S. If you're interested in exploring how I can help you live an empowered life in service of your biggest commitments and deepest desires, schedule an exploration conversation with me. 💌