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Blog: Explorations and Reflections

on awakening the True Self.

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  • Writer's pictureMick Scott

It’s an honor and a blessing to engage with people at the level I get to engage with them. This week, as I was coaching a couple, 50 minutes into the conversation I shared a thread I had been picking up on:


Grace.


There are two types of grace: the grace we receive and the grace we give.


The grace we receive is infinite and abundant. More than 99% of our lives and experience are the result of the grace we receive.


Vision, hearing, thinking, feeling, smelling, and tasting. Trees, animals, planets, stars, and galaxies. Minds and ideas. Relationships and conversations. Atoms, molecules, and cells. Breath, blood, smiles, tears, skin, and bones. The beingness of the universe.


The vast majority of the grace we receive comes from the Divine. The other grace we receive comes from the people in our lives. Our friends. Our spouses. The way they trust us, show up for us, honor us with their love, time, effort, concern, words, and generosity.


The grace we receive we mostly receive in ignorance. Yet, every single moment and every single part of our experience of life is given to us generously and continuously.


The second type of grace is the grace we give.


We give grace through our being.


Grace creates space. Grace softens the hard edges. Grace is a gift to the self and to the other. Grace is a gateway. Grace is an invitation. Grace is necessary.


There are two beautiful, powerful, and profound ways we can easily give grace: how we listen and how we speak.


We can listen with grace by assuming the best in the other. By assuming we don’t know what they’re talking about and listening very carefully. By listening like we’ve never heard this person speak before. By listening not defensively, but freely, courageously, vulnerably, and compassionately.


Listening with grace is one of the most generous and impactful gifts we can give.


To speak with grace is to speak with kindness. To speak with care. To speak with gentleness. To speak with love. To speak while also listening to how we’re being heard.


In our coaching conversation this week, my couple client found a new level of Love in their relationship by finding grace - and not in the obvious place we always look, which is in receiving grace from our partner. No, they accessed a new level of Love by learning to access a new level of giving grace - in their listening and their speaking. And they created a powerful mantra to remind themselves of this powerful distinction.


If you got value out of this post, consider sharing it with someone who might benefit!


Much Love. ❤️

  • Writer's pictureMick Scott

Our default way of thinking and being is cheap


It doesn’t take effort. It doesn’t take time. It doesn’t take soul.


It’s cheap to judge. It’s cheap to criticize. It's cheap to condemn.


We cheapen the value of others with the way we think and talk about them. We cheapen the value of ourselves this way too.


This cheap, default thinking and being is junk food for the soul - in some way it feels good (or else we wouldn't do it), yet it harms us and it harms others.


We’re just so used to it. We were raised in it. Our culture surrounds us with it. We’ve practiced it for years.


To be fair, most drama we enjoy as entertainment wouldn't exist if it weren't for our propensity to bull-crap ourselves and others with cheap, judgmental, and condemning thought and action.


The truth about this default "thinking" is that it’s not actually thinking at all. Default "thinking" is merely thoughts that happen to us.


It’s much more accurate to say not that we have these thoughts, but that these thoughts have us.


Here’s the intention of these default thoughts: to dress up the false self. To dress up the ego. To dress up the scared, lonely, unworthy, and unhealed parts of ourselves.


To cut others down in our minds so as to make ourselves seem taller. 


To protect ourselves as much as possible from the fear of looking bad.


To distract ourselves with cheap ways of being (judgmental, critical) to avoid having to generate ourselves, be a little vulnerable, and make a positive difference in our lives and the lives of others.


Hate is cheap. Insult is cheap. Judgment is cheap. Anger is cheap. 


Love and Creativity, on the other hand, are expensive. 


They take will. They take courage. They take humility. They take generosity. They take vulnerability.


They require real thinking, with the mind and the heart.


So do compassion, authentic self-expression, peace of mind, freedom, and faith.


Let’s agree to stop cheapening our lives with judgment and condemnation of ourselves and others. Some things are worth paying for.


Much Love. ❤️

I'd never read manga (Japanese comic books) before. My nephew recently recommended two of them to me: I Had That Same Dream Again and I Want to Eat Your Pancreas. Both of them got me crying, and the second one had me sobbing at one point.


They both put me in touch with the preciousness of life and every - single - moment - we - have (including the challenging and painful ones).


Have you heard of gratitude journaling? Getting present to 1-to-3 things you're grateful for each day. 


It's a powerful practice. And 3 a day is puny.


A couple weeks ago I went to the eye doctor and got my pupils dilated (as well as some really cool sunglasses 😎). My vision got so blurry! 


One of my daily self-creation declarations is "I see beauty in everything." And yet, until I had my pupils dilated, I never even thought to thank my eyes for showing me the universe.


That day I began thanking my eyes (and my ears). Thank you for the gift of vision. Thank you for being healthy enough to show me colors and shapes and sites. Thank you for serving me so fully without ever any acknowledgment.


And thank you, God / Creator / Universe / Spirit / Mystery, for the profound gift of eyes and vision.


We're in a universe in which we can create gratitude for everything. 


The question to ask isn't, "What are you grateful for?"


The question to ask is, "What are you willing to be grateful for?"


Gratitude, like Love, is not just a feeling - it's an act of the will. It isn't a noun - it's not something we have. It's a verb, it's something we do or something we be, intentionally. 


Get in the driver's seat with gratitude. Don't wait for the feeling to fall into your lap by circumstance or conditioning.


Create gratitude. Generate gratitude. Be gratitude expressed. 


How? Start with, "Thank you," and then get filling in the blank.


It's a muscle and it's a practice. 


It's an access to experiencing the Divine that is, instead of getting caught up and blinded by our own arrogant judgments and stories of how things should be some other way.


The only thing between each of us and a life with more gratitude and love is our willingness to say, "Thank you."


You don't have to. And I invite you to.


Much Love. ❤️


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