Petting My Dog, Healing Myself

Yesterday was an extraordinary Mind Mastery workshop at a school. The conversation was deep and powerful. Students grappling with stress over grades, overthinking and worry about friendships, regret and self-dislike, being authentic with parents and friends, setting boundaries without being mean, peace of mind, confidence, and enjoyment. 

It’s amazing to see how stress over a science test becomes the many faces of stress in adulthood, and it doesn't have to be that way - something else is possible. It’s an honor to engage with this age group and support their mental, emotional, and spiritual growth and fulfillment.

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In my own inner work, I’ve learned to treat the uncomfortable, painful, and challenging parts of myself gently, like they're children that don't know better. 

I encourage clients to do the same. Yesterday at the teen Mind Mastery event, I suggested it to them too - consider that anxious, helpless, scared, hopeless part of you like it’s a little child that doesn’t know better. Would you shove that child away? Would you hate that child? 

For some people, imagining that inner uncomfortable or painful part as a pet is also very powerful. A couple that I coach realized that they would never treat their animals the way they treat each other sometimes - that’s a powerful insight!

So when my fear comes up or my mind kicks into overthinking or worry, I engage with it like it’s a child - with arms wide open, gentle words, and loving attention. 

The first time we do this, it’s like asking a child to trust us even though we’ve been mean to it for decades. So it’s reluctant. It’s looking for consistency. It wants to trust us, but it needs consistency to really see it. 

So we show up daily. We keep creating space for it. We keep speaking kindly to it. We keep relating lovingly towards it. 

And we can practice it elsewhere too…

My dog is super sweet and loves attention. This morning I got down at his level, pet him and hugged him. As I did so, I visualized him as my fears, my insecure thoughts, my sometimes-busy mind, my stresses. In this way, my dog gets my love, and so do those parts of me that I’d otherwise resist, shun, or hate.

Just as a my discomfort and pain can be experienced as a surrogate for a lovable inner child, my dog can be a surrogate for healing that same discomfort and pain.

Every moment of our lives is an opportunity for healing, integration, and wholeness. We are always training our subconscious, and it’s our subconscious that’s usually in control when our experience in life goes haywire or painful.

Treating my dog with kindness and love, thanking my blankets for their warmth, bringing kindness to people in my household even when I’m feeling stingy - doing these things intentionally and wholly, I’m taking care of my inner parts too. 

Much Love. ❤️