How to Become the Bravest Person You Know

“You are literally the bravest person I know.”

I received that one-line email from an experienced and respected colleague soon after a faculty culture development session.

Here’s something that I've found that works really well in conversations with others (and in life in general!): aligning my intentions with my commitments.

I'm committed to excellence and the well-being of all life (including me). When I align my moment-to-moment intentions with this commitment, I am invincible.

Whether you agree or not, I know that you are committed to big and important things for yourself, others, and the world. Your well-being matters to you. The well-being of people you care about matters to you. And you’ve got a set of core values that you’d be quite pleased to see the world embrace.

And if you’re like the rest of us, there’s less-important junk that gets in the way of you aligning your actions with your commitments.

Maybe it’s a fear of disappointing others, of hurting someone’s feelings, of feeling embarrassed or ashamed, or a fear of being outcast. Maybe it’s an insecurity that you won’t express yourself well, that you’re not exactly sure how to say what you mean, or what it might mean if someone misunderstands you.

Or perhaps you’re just a well-trained and habitual people-pleaser.

All of that junk - so real and so limiting as it is - has one thing in common: it’s all about you.

It’s about your fears. It’s about your insecurities. It’s about people being pleased with you.

When your commitments to others, to your institutions, and to the world become more important than saving face…

When loving, serving, or authentically connecting with others becomes more important than pleasing them…

When positive impacts become more important than our temporary feelings of fear, discomfort, or embarrassment…

That’s when we live with integrity. That’s when we align our internal commitments with our external actions. That’s when we act from our true self and not our survival-based personality.

That’s when we are living responsibly from our own inner, authentic inspiration for what’s possible rather than simply maintaining the status quo of what's probable.

The status quo has never been enough for you. You’ve always known this.

You’ve always known that something else is possible and your soul is longing for it.

Living a life of integrity is an option for you in each and every moment of your life. And here’s how to begin: commit to it.

Commit to aligning your internal and external worlds. Commit to expressing your spiritual truth in your words and behaviors. Commit to honoring yourself and others equally, compassionately, lovingly, and honestly.

Then, align your moment-to-moment intentions with those commitments.

That is the path, and you’re ready to walk it.

Be the bravest person you know.

Thank you so much for engaging with my work. 🙏❤️

P.S. As a transformational life coach, I help people move beyond their self-imposed limitations to fall in love with life and feel amazing. If you’re interested in finding out how I can support you, reach out and let’s talk. 💌

What Does Amazing Take?

What would it take - from you - to live an amazing life?

The most important relationships in your life - what would it take from you for those relationships to be amazing?

Your job - what would it take from you for it to be an amazing job?

Your physical health…

Your mental health…

Your emotional heath…

Your spiritual health…

What would it take from you to elevate your health to an amazing level?

Are you waiting for someone else - or some other circumstances - to give you permission or access to living an amazing life? If you are, you’ll be waiting a while.

An amazing life isn’t a pipe dream. It isn’t for someone else more privileged or lucky than you. It isn’t for someone with the perfect parents, the richest resources, or a better body or brain.

An amazing life is for you and it’s for me.

An amazing life begins with our willingness. Our willingness to cause. Our willingness to source. Our willingness to be 100% responsible for amazing across the board.

Living an amazing life doesn’t mean we have all the answers. It simply means that we’re willing to look for them and remain empowered about it.

Whether our lives are amazing only depends on how we choose to show up - how we choose to be in the face of our circumstances, for the people in our lives, for the work and activities we’ve committed to.

You and I and everyone else are already amazing. We’ve just got barriers to our experience of it, and we’ve got barriers to our expression of it.

Move beyond your own barriers to your innate amazingness, and with new sight watch your world transform.

Thank you for engaging with my work. 🙏❤️

💌 As a transformational life coach, I help people live their best life by breaking through their limitations to feel amazing and create a life they love. If you’re interested in finding out how I can support you, reach out and let’s talk.

Cut Your Chains, Then Go Create

A client shared that he was feeling overwhelmed and anxious about his plans for the future with his family. He and his wife want to move into a better school district, and they also want a comfortable home that meets all their desires in a home.

This sounds like a perfect thing to plan for, right? So why the overwhelm and anxiety?

You see, each of us can get in touch with a wide open space of possibility. Possibilities for our relationships, for our work, for our family, for our home, for our fitness, for our enjoyment. Such options seem just over the horizon.

We can often more easily see possibilities for other people. You could just do this. She could just go there. You're so amazing at that!

This client knows he and his wife can create an amazing home and future for the family, but when overwhelm and anxiety are in the driver’s seat, he can’t move forward nearly as effectively or enjoyably as he’s able.

Behind our overwhelm and anxiety is always a single thought. This might seem impossible or improbable, and it might seem too simplistic, but it’s true.

So my client and I uncovered this thought sourcing his anxiety, and then we explored the full picture that gets played out when he’s feeling overwhelmed and anxious as a result of this thought.

His thought: “I’m gonna screw this up.”

Seems so simple and obvious, right? And what’s the big deal, don’t we all have this thought?!

This single thought was at the source of his overwhelm and anxiety, and it robbed him of his peace of mind, freedom, and love as a father.

When we do the work of creating a future without first uncovering our pre-existing limiting beliefs about ourselves, we usually end up in one of two places - either we give up and avoid the challenges of creating our dream, or we plow through and battle our way to victory. In other words, we either get resigned or we get exhausted.

There’s another way: get clear to be well, and then create.

My client found well-being (clarity, ease, and peace of mind) in our conversation because he saw that it wasn’t his circumstances that were overwhelming and anxiety-producing - it was his own thinking that was creating the overwhelm and anxiety. Once he had this insight and was able to relax into his innate well-being, he was filled with gratitude and love for his family and his life. He was empowered to move forward in a healthy and creative way to fulfill his commitments and feel great along the way.

This may sound obvious, but well-being is a state of being. We all have access to well-being right now without changing a thing. In fact, the most powerful access to well-being is getting that there’s not a thing we need to change in order to be well.

As my client said in the conversation: “I had shackled myself to that thinking and that feeling.” When he cut loose the chain, he was freed up to be well, enjoy and love his life, and move forward creatively and effectively.

What did he create in that new opening and space of well-being? He created peace, freedom, enjoyment, and love with his family.

So, dear reader, be well and then go create.

Thanks so much for engaging with my work. 🙏❤️

💌 As a transformational life coach, I help people live their best life by breaking through their limitations to feel amazing and create a life they love. If you’re interested in finding out how I can support you, reach out and let’s talk.