The Day I Became an Adult

This post is about when I became an adult.

I don’t mean when I biologically or intellectually became an adult. I don’t mean when I socially or legally became an adult. I don’t mean when I graduated high school or when I had my first serious relationship. I don’t mean the first time I paid a bill or when I got my driver’s license. I don’t mean when I became a dad or earned my first salary paycheck.

None of that made me an adult - getting older is not the same as growing up.

I became an adult when I became willing to be 100% responsible for my life. 100% responsible for my actions, results, thoughts, feelings, impacts, and experience.

The day I became an adult was the day I realized that my experience of myself, others, and my life had nothing to do with my circumstances and everything to do with how I responded to my circumstances.

It was the day I realized that my circumstances don’t have power over me - my judgments, expectations, fears, stories, and insecurities had power over me, and I fed them with my ignorance, lack of awareness, and blame.

Every moment we have an opportunity to blame our circumstances and the people in our lives. But that’s not as free, fun, or fulfilling as being responsible.

Responsibility is often a heavy word. It usually carries weight and significance, obligation and morality, duty and commitment, seriousness and stress.

Responsibility: the ability to respond, without constraint, no matter the circumstances.

Response-ability isn’t heavy and significant - we bring heaviness and significance to it.

Response-ability isn’t an obligation or moral duty - we bring obligation and morality to it.

Response-ability isn’t serious or demanding - we bring seriousness to it.

Responsibility has nothing to do with obligation and everything to do with opportunity.

100% Responsibility is freeing - we're no longer dependent on the world around us to show up any certain way.

100% Responsibility is empowering - insight, well-being, and action have always come from within and always will come from within.

100% Responsibility is creative - when we take it on as our job to show up, to take empowered and inspired action, to foster positive feelings and a positive environment, we can begin anywhere and move in any direction.

The day I became an adult is the day I decided to take 100% responsibility for my life and my experience of it. I invite you to join me in this powerful, freeing, and creative realm of being.

For myself, I've found that I'm either being 100% responsible or I'm being adolescent.

Thanks so much for reading. ❤️

The Exploration Continues

Explorations and reflections on awakening the true self in education.

Last January I wondered what I might discover and uncover by blogging twice weekly for a year, so I committed to it. Last week that year came to an end: I posted 104 times in 52 weeks - every Monday and Thursday - without missing a post. I’m proud of following through, and I’m grateful for the privilege of time, experience, inspiration, and articulation to be able to so.

So many of you have followed this journey. ❤️ I’m grateful for your interest, time, and attention. Thank you. 🙏

One year of showing up, and here’s a sampling of what I discovered:

• There really is a well-being gap in education and filling that gap begins with educators, the adult already in the room.

• Teaching has been a phenomenal education for me, and I’m privileged to have been trusted to teach.

• Teaching, as well as any profession that offers us an audience, is a profound opportunity to connect, to guide, to love, and to grow.

• Taking responsibility is still one of the most powerful actions I can ever take, and this is one of the key lessons missing in our and our students’ education.

• Getting grounded and setting intentions has been a critical tool in my profession and life. I always perform better when I do this.

• My calling is to guide adults, especially educators, to transformational insight and action through coaching and workshops. This path is inevitable, and I’m walking it.

• I’m an artist, and having transformational conversations is my art.

This exploration continues! For the next year, I will be posting to this blog just once weekly instead of twice. I'll post on Monday.

During the next couple months, I will also be putting together and sharing ebooks of a few different categories of my writing from the last year. I’m excited to work on this next project!

Thanks again for sharing this journey with me. If you’re willing, I’d greatly appreciate your taking a couple minutes to let me know how you’ve received my writing - you can click this link and it will take you to a brief survey.

I hope you have a healthy, satisfying, and enjoyable week. Thank you so much for reading my work. ❤️

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P.S. If you're interested in seeing what inner magic coaching with me might unlock for you, or what difference it might make for your school or organization to host my workshops, sign up for a free 30-minute conversation to discuss it with me!

Creatively Intentional

"Each time I walk into a classroom, I can choose the place within myself from which my teaching will come, just as I can choose the place within my students toward which my teaching will be aimed." - Parker Palmer, The Courage to Teach.

In our actions, inactions, complaints, desires, struggles, thoughts, fears, expectations, and hopes - in all of it - there’s intention. A powerful access to freedom is to discover and then be honest with ourselves about our invisible intentions.

By uncovering our default invisible intentions, we give ourselves room to create new intentions. Created intentions are an access to effectiveness and enjoyment in the classroom and in life.

Teachers can be creatively intentional. Lesson planning with objectives is creative intentionality, but we also should be creatively intentional about who we’re being with our students.

Parents can be creatively intentional with our kids too.

In fact, we can all be creatively intentional in anything we do.

When we’re not creatively intentional, we’re living from default intentions. Default intentions are fine - they’ve gotten us this far - they’re just not likely to get us any farther.

Going into classes today, I’m going to be generous, patient, and engaged. I’ll honor the lesson plan and the kids will learn, and they’re also going to know that they can relax, enjoy, and express themselves with me.

Where have you been living from default intentions?

What intentions could you create instead?

Thanks so much for reading. ❤️